The Wallflower Report

Hey guys sorry I haven’t like been all posting or whatever the last couple days but you know how the holidays can sneak up on you this time of year right?

And not just the usual ones either. Just yesterday I was minding my own business when BAM! out of nowhere comes St. Patrick’s Day. Yeah. I know. It kind of freaked me out. The day before that? It was Administrative Assistant’s (Formerly Secretary’s) Day, the day when we celebrate our former secretaries.

So today I’m putting my foot down and refusing to even look at the calendar no matter how strongly it tempts me. It could be Bonfire Day or Bastille Day for all I care.

Anyway that’s the reason I haven’t been writing but it’s not what I wanted to write about for today.

Has anybody seen those Toaster Scramble pastry things from like Pillsbury that are basically a breakfast skillet inside a Pop Tart? I don’t mean to sound like I’m suggesting there’s a better and more perfect breakfast food out there than FruityPebbles but these just might come close. Bacon and eggs and cheese and stuff inside a flaky crust and it comes right out of the toaster. It’s even better than when Hot Pocket came out with pot pies.

The thing is I kind of remember that they tried marketing something like this before but it didn’t work so well because grease from the bacon would catch fire and stuff and flames would shoot out of the toaster, like you used to be able to do with the real jam strawberry Pop Tarts. They pulled the original more flametastic breakfast toaster thingies off the market really quick but I think there could be a market for them only as more of a novelty item. They could call it “edible arson.”

Anyway even though like the breakfast technology has now caught up to the dream of being able to put a small rectangle of pastry in the toaster and then being able to eat bacon and eggs they don’t have all the kinks worked out quite yet. In order to make sure they cook all the way through after coming out of the freezer you have to toast them on a higher setting than is good for Pop Tarts and so they come out of the toaster really hot.

Also if you toast them on their sides so they cook more evenly instead of standing up and down then it’s almost harder to get them out before the toaster cools than it is to get a pizza out of the oven with your bare hands.

I managed though. I think they might have even thrown a parade for me because of it but that might just be a surprise Veteran’s Day or Fourth of July.

~Ariella Rasputin Wallflower

This entry was posted on Friday, December 21st, 2007 at 8:23 am and is filed under Food. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.