The Wallflower Report

So I saw a movie called The Bourne Ultimatum the other night.

Actually there’s kind of a funny story about how it happened. Mike–that’s Paris’s boyfriend–was like “Hey Ari do you wanna go see The Bourne Ultimatum with us?” and I thought he said “Do you wanna go see the boring old tomato with us?” and it’s like, who wouldn’t want to see that?

I mean it’s old, and boring, and it’s a tomato so… actually, wait. I can’t think of anybody who would want to see that. I don’t know why I wanted to see it.

But still it got me in the door so maybe that’s what the filmmakers were going for. Viral marketing, you know? That’s pretty big these days.

Anyway it was a pretty okay movie. I mean, it seemed very realistic in that there were no robot cars or dinosaurs or trees or anything impossible like that in it, and also in that the movie kept telling you so. Right away in like the first scene, one of the characters says “You couldn’t make something like this up.” And every so often just in case you forgot another character would remind you, “This isn’t a story!” or “This is real life!” or something like that. It’s kind of hard to figure how they could have made it any more convincing without looking right at the audience when they said it and winking or something, but maybe that would have been too much reality. 

Also the camera shook a whole bunch and at one point there was a close-up of a guy who had zits.  That’s what’s called “cinéma-vérité”, which I believe is French for “variety show”.

So anyway at the end of the movie it said it was based on a novel by Robert Ludlum. Mike snorted when he saw that and said “More like based on the cover of a novel by Robert Ludlum.”

Paris thought this was kind of funny but I didn’t get it. So today when I was in the grocery store and I saw the book of The Bourne Ultimatum by the checkout I picked it up to see what he was talking about. According to cover it’s got something to do with a carnival and an Oriental professor who fought Medusa and a jackal named Carlos or something and none of that stuff was in the movie at all so I don’t think Mike really knew what he was talking about.

Really it sounds a lot more like a Disney movie than what we saw.

But anyway no matter how much it didn’t have to do with the cover of a novel by Robert Ludlum, The Bourne Ultimatum was still a pretty good movie. I mean, in the illustrious field of movies where people crash a lot of cars and punch and kick and shoot a whole bunch of times, it’s no Transporter or anything, but then there’s only one Transporter, you know?

Or wait.

Wasn’t there a second Transporter?

~Ariella Rasputin Wallflower

This entry was posted on Saturday, November 24th, 2007 at 8:00 am and is filed under Movies. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.